Giles Coren
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Giles Coren
One for the p...k list?
This is part of his column in today's Times:-
" I was lucky enough to get tickets for the Arsenal game on Sunday and despite the horror of the home team's performance, it was a treat to get out of the house. My seven-year-old son was over the moon to go to his first match in nearly a year and there was the added wonder ( unknown since going to QPR with my own father in the late 1970's ) of being able to drive to the ground in five minutes through trafficless streets and park pretty much at the gate. Add to that being able to buy pies and go for wees without the hint of a queue, and it hardly mattered that we lost to a worse team than Sam and his Regent's Park U9's had thrashed 8-2 on the Saturday. "
I like his sister, though
This is part of his column in today's Times:-
" I was lucky enough to get tickets for the Arsenal game on Sunday and despite the horror of the home team's performance, it was a treat to get out of the house. My seven-year-old son was over the moon to go to his first match in nearly a year and there was the added wonder ( unknown since going to QPR with my own father in the late 1970's ) of being able to drive to the ground in five minutes through trafficless streets and park pretty much at the gate. Add to that being able to buy pies and go for wees without the hint of a queue, and it hardly mattered that we lost to a worse team than Sam and his Regent's Park U9's had thrashed 8-2 on the Saturday. "
I like his sister, though
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Re: Giles Coren
I have no idea who he is
Re: Giles Coren
There was me about to put RIP Giles Coren
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Re: Giles Coren
Proper p*ick this fella.
Cannot stand him.
Cannot stand him.
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Re: Giles Coren
He is a regular columnist in The Times, and is a restaurant critic.
He is Victoria Coren Mitchell"s brother.
Re: Giles Coren
what does that say about Arsenal when”The fact that we lost to a worse team than Sam and his Regent's Park U9's had thrashed 8-2 on the Saturday. "
The article has a sense of bitterness, which really pleases me
The article has a sense of bitterness, which really pleases me
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Re: Giles Coren
His opinion of Burnley makes the win even better.
I've been sat in the home end down there a couple of times for one of our games and another one.
They're deluded at the best of times.
Cheering Rosicky, who spent a lot of time injured and booing Walcot who'd played a lot more games at that point
I've been sat in the home end down there a couple of times for one of our games and another one.
They're deluded at the best of times.
Cheering Rosicky, who spent a lot of time injured and booing Walcot who'd played a lot more games at that point
Re: Giles Coren
His piece on saturday about going out for a pie and a pint with his mate - telling the door staff at the pub that this guy was his "husband" and therefore part of his household to get round the Tier 2 restrictions, perhaps just about sums up why the capital is now in the mess that its in ....... and I certainly wouldnt fill a column in a national newspaper about it!
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Re: Giles Coren
Bit gutted to read this as, despite being insufferably middle-class, he is generally a fairly entertaining and witty writer in his columns in The Times. Doubt he knows much about football at all tbh.....probably just read Fever Pitch when his islington chum Nick Hornby gave him a signed copy and decided to jump on the bandwagon a few years back when football became trendy. He's obviously trying to be funny here and failing. Offensive to us lot obviously but nothing to get too exercised about.
Re: Giles Coren
A definite prick.
He might want to start looking for another job as well, if he’s a restaurant critic.
He might want to start looking for another job as well, if he’s a restaurant critic.
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Re: Giles Coren
Should stick to writing about food. What was the pie like?
Re: Giles Coren
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Fvjk47UORFs Fast Show got there first.
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Re: Giles Coren
He's a columnist and it's a persona.
He's an egotist and he loves himself. No more, no less. I'd happily share a pint with him.
He's an egotist and he loves himself. No more, no less. I'd happily share a pint with him.
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Re: Giles Coren
I think it's worth sharing the Giles Coren's full report on his match night experience.
Of course, we all disagree with his assessment of the team that beat his team. GC isn't a sports reporter, so I think we can view his comments as no more than any football fan's comments after his team has been beaten. That aside - and, as we couldn't be at the game itself - his description of the "few people in the ground" passing on their coaching instructions is pretty good to read.
Happy losers
I was lucky enough to get tickets for the Arsenal game on Sunday night and, despite the horror of the home team’s performance, it was a treat to get out of the house. My seven-year-old son was over the moon to go to his first match in nearly a year and there was the added wonder (unknown since going to QPR with my own father in the late 1970s) of being able to drive to the ground in five minutes through trafficless streets and park pretty much at the gate. Add to that being able to buy pies and go for wees without the hint of a queue, and it hardly mattered that we lost to a worse team than Sam and his Regent’s Park U9s had thrashed 8-2 on the Saturday.
Best of all, with so few people in the ground (2,000 spaced very widely), all the self-important loons who spend the match shouting coaching instructions (“easy ball, easy ball”, “Turn! Turn!”) as if they can actually be heard, can actually be heard. You could see middle-aged men believing, for the first time, that if they shouted “shoot!” into the silence, Aubameyang might actually shoot, as if it were a video game.
Better still, yells of “hold the line, wait for his run!” would be met from 100 yards away by a fully audible cry of, “no, you want to drop deep and hit these ****s on the break”, then a wife shouting, “you’ve already said that twice…”, another bloke shouting, “well, if you want my opinion, he needs to be taken out and shot”, until it began to feel like the tail end of a really bad dinner party, when the last remaining guests, too drunk even to call a cab, just shout boring opinions at each other until they pass out.
Shouting match
Best of all was when fans stood up to scream abuse, only to remember that they were wearing masks and couldn’t be heard properly. Like when a big, fat, tattooed lad stood up to scream “MURFLE-FFLLFF-GLGL-AFFFAFFAFF!” then paused, furiously tore off the red and white mask that was muffling his bon mots, and repeated at top volume, “F*** OFF XHAKA YOU F****** C***!!!!”
Of course, we all disagree with his assessment of the team that beat his team. GC isn't a sports reporter, so I think we can view his comments as no more than any football fan's comments after his team has been beaten. That aside - and, as we couldn't be at the game itself - his description of the "few people in the ground" passing on their coaching instructions is pretty good to read.
Happy losers
I was lucky enough to get tickets for the Arsenal game on Sunday night and, despite the horror of the home team’s performance, it was a treat to get out of the house. My seven-year-old son was over the moon to go to his first match in nearly a year and there was the added wonder (unknown since going to QPR with my own father in the late 1970s) of being able to drive to the ground in five minutes through trafficless streets and park pretty much at the gate. Add to that being able to buy pies and go for wees without the hint of a queue, and it hardly mattered that we lost to a worse team than Sam and his Regent’s Park U9s had thrashed 8-2 on the Saturday.
Best of all, with so few people in the ground (2,000 spaced very widely), all the self-important loons who spend the match shouting coaching instructions (“easy ball, easy ball”, “Turn! Turn!”) as if they can actually be heard, can actually be heard. You could see middle-aged men believing, for the first time, that if they shouted “shoot!” into the silence, Aubameyang might actually shoot, as if it were a video game.
Better still, yells of “hold the line, wait for his run!” would be met from 100 yards away by a fully audible cry of, “no, you want to drop deep and hit these ****s on the break”, then a wife shouting, “you’ve already said that twice…”, another bloke shouting, “well, if you want my opinion, he needs to be taken out and shot”, until it began to feel like the tail end of a really bad dinner party, when the last remaining guests, too drunk even to call a cab, just shout boring opinions at each other until they pass out.
Shouting match
Best of all was when fans stood up to scream abuse, only to remember that they were wearing masks and couldn’t be heard properly. Like when a big, fat, tattooed lad stood up to scream “MURFLE-FFLLFF-GLGL-AFFFAFFAFF!” then paused, furiously tore off the red and white mask that was muffling his bon mots, and repeated at top volume, “F*** OFF XHAKA YOU F****** C***!!!!”
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Re: Giles Coren
Giles Coren also addresses his restaurant eating out behaviours in his column today:uni_queue wrote: ↑Tue Dec 15, 2020 2:47 pmHis piece on saturday about going out for a pie and a pint with his mate - telling the door staff at the pub that this guy was his "husband" and therefore part of his household to get round the Tier 2 restrictions, perhaps just about sums up why the capital is now in the mess that its in ....... and I certainly wouldnt fill a column in a national newspaper about it!
Burley’s luck
Some girls have all the luck. Kay Burley has a couple of drinks after hours and is punished with a six-month holiday, immediately heading off to Africa on safari. Meanwhile, I repeatedly flout the restaurant attendance rules, admit to it regularly in print, upset a handful of below-the-line commenters whom everyone ignores, and find myself still stuck in England, working right through to Christmas.
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Re: Giles Coren
Typical self abusing, entitled, Arsenal fan
No one has a right to win any games in football without guts graft and goals
It's a simple game, those who score the most goals win. We deserved the win but dont expect any praise from the media.UTC
No one has a right to win any games in football without guts graft and goals
It's a simple game, those who score the most goals win. We deserved the win but dont expect any praise from the media.UTC
Re: Giles Coren
What a grade one c-unt he sounds
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Re: Giles Coren
" Giles " .. tells you pretty much all you need to know...
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Re: Giles Coren
Quite an amusing restaurant critic tbf ( he’s no AA Gill mind ) Though he’s the last person you can ever imagine at a match . I’m minded of the old fast show “ new football fan “ character but an agonisingly middle class version . Probs says “ boo hiss” when Utd come on the telly
Re: Giles Coren
Worth googling his article about how his holiday with his three year old daughter was sexy.
Troubling.
Troubling.
Re: Giles Coren
His Dad was Alan Coran also a journo and on TV and radio quite a bit
Very very funny man was Alan
Both his children have acquired his sense of humour
Very very funny man was Alan
Both his children have acquired his sense of humour
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Re: Giles Coren
I much preferred football in the days before these characters became " interested ". Seemed to happen around the time all the money starting coming into the game.
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Re: Giles Coren
From one of those hugely irritating self satisfied media dynasties in which the talent chromosome degrades exponentially